A Christmas Gift

Before I begin, apologies for the long absence.

It’s been a post I’ve meant to do since I got the news but got a bit carried away since arriving back in Melbourne.

Late last year I was told that I had a lump in my right breast and was to go for half-yearly checks for growths and risks. It dawned on me the seriousness of my condition when I was referred to a breast cancer surgeon this year and was told that my lump grew. A biopsy was performed and by the grace of God, benign.

I’ve cut alcohol, tried to be healthy. I’m not gonna lie and say it was smooth sailing, I struggled. There were times I’d even wanna forget about it, that there was no such thing. I was only 22, to face the news that women only receive during their mid-life crisis… here I am, not even hitting the quarter-life, but with a growing lump that may be potentially cancerous??

As the date for my next scan approached, it dawned on me that it’s time to face the news again, this time without my mother. I was back in Melbourne, alone. She was in Malaysia. I started my fervent praying for the lump to not grow, or maybe miraculously shrink…

I told my parents I could do this alone, the scan had to be done regardless, it’s for my health anyway. But just the day before, I had a mini-breakdown at my hoome-group over the fear of receiving bad news alone. Thankfully, 2 of my friends agreed to come along to give me support at the Clinic.

God had better plans.

The ultrasound technician spent a good 10 minutes rolling the stick around my boob, the warm gel had turn chilly and no news about the lump. (This was meant to be a good thing, but the technician’s confused face just made me worried).

That’s weird… I can’t find the lump” She was squinting her eyes at the screen. “I think I will call in another specialist to find it for me… this never happens”

Another specialist came in, this time having my previous scans, bot technician and specialist were trying to scrutinize the scans as hard as possible. “This is an unusual case, here I was thinking that you’re an easy one but no…” she said. The specialist chimed in and said, “Looks like the problem solved itself”.

It was then I knew, that miracles happen.

God heals. More than I’d even asked for.

The breast surgeon I was seeing did a final check and told me that the lump was gone.

God’s early Christmas miracle on the 30th of November.

I’m writing this down because it is a testament to God’s love. It is something I had always believed in but never occurred in my personal life until that day, where my lump fully disappeared.

Bear in mind, I did not think I’d deserved it. I’m a normal human being who makes mistakes, commit failures and occasionally falling into temptation. There were times I succumbed to worldly things despite my faith, I was the last person to deserve such a miracle but God gave it to me.

You may believe you are undeserving, but God gives miracles and gifts to those He believes in, those He believes that deserve, no matter how undeserving we feel we are.

My heart was so full that day, typing this makes my heart full again as I was experiencing a bad day just before. It will serve me as a constant reminder that I am loved, that God loves us so much that He sent His only begotten Son for us, this Christmas day.

The Greatest Christmas Gift.