The Fault in Our Stars. Post-exam feels. Mission Trip feels.

There are some movies that are great to watch with people and there are some best watched alone. I wailed… wailed.. at the end of The Fault in Our Stars.

My heart was so shattered.

Augustus Waters isn’t even real.

Yesterday was the first time I watched the movie. I was anticipating it since John Green announced it’s movie released.  But due to unfortunate circumstances and awkward country movie releases (from travelling), I missed the cinema openings. So there I was last night, after exams, on my couch, at 1am.. sobbing loudly and wailing like an idiot.. a few months late.

It was one of those books that left me emotionally affected for days. I remember the first time finishing it last year. I couldn’t believe it. I re-read the book a few more times to allow my heart to be won and shattered a few more times… by a fictitious male called Augustus Waters.

Seeing Hazel and Gus come live before my eyes last night in my living room was crazy.

Some parts from the book however felt much better when left on paper than played out. I can’t imagine someone actually blurting out “You’re Beautiful” in real life after meeting the first time. No. I don’t know… it’s just never happened to me and seeing that played out made me upset because I know it probably never happen to me urghh.

But the speeches, everything. So beautifully written. Arghhh.

The acting, casting… mindblown. Perfect.

I know this is a review too late. But I have finally watched it. I am so satisfied and glad the way John Green helped out with screenplay. I’m going to be so emotionally affected for the next few days. Yes I am a very emotional person… even with movies.

This why I don’t watch sad movies with people.

change of pace…

Now that my exams are over, I’ll have more time to blog the 101 topics I have so desperately want to regurgitate from my mind through my hands onto the screen. One of the main ones besides the ones I mentioned in my previous post, will be about my Mission Trip.

My first ever Mission Trip!

I’ll be making a category for that so any mission trippy related things will go in there. I was told to journal about this officially by my team but since I have this blog already running, I may as well do it here.

I would have to say, I ended my exams on a note I did not expect. I deprived myself from all the distractions I was looking forward to (such as the movie) and as much self-control I’d practiced, there were other nonsense that came into play in .. aka online shopping. I regretted and slacked during my last couple of days of study and when the Anatomy paper landed on my face, my heart fell.

I think I spent half my Anatomy exam just praying to God to give me whatever terms that came into my mind to put on paper. I don’t if they were all correct or if they even made sense, I was too sad to look into my notes after that as I was too afraid it will be wrong.

It’s all in God’s hands now. I have to trust in Him and leave all that anxiety off me. I believe He has the best intentions at hand. I know part of that feeling comes in my part for not putting enough effort on the last couple of days, I will have God to carry me through whatever that will happen and it will be a miracle and blessing if the results of all my subjects come out alright.

Meanwhile I shall not let the devil of anxiety and fear get into the midst of my current goals and focus. Mission Trip. This is God’s work. I’m going to put my full effort and focus into preparing myself for what’s ahead and God will settle the rest. I shall now do my part.

Get pumped. Get ready. Lots to do. Very excited. Woooooots

Post exam lunch and catch up with a dear friend. The paper couldn't stop me from getting my long awaited cravings for Laksa
Post exam lunch and catch up with a dear friend. The paper couldn’t stop me from getting my long awaited cravings for Laksa
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